Mainly Mita

It was only a matter of time before Jeff Foxworthytook a couple of shots at Colorado! Thanks, Jeff

Posted by d Spouse

1. You switch from ‘Heat’ to ‘A/C’ in one day.
2. You know what the ‘Peoples Republic of Boulder’means.
3. Your sense of direction is: towards the mountains and away from the mountains.
4. You’re a meat-eating vegetarian.
5. The bike on your car is worth more than your car and you have your own special bike lane.
6. You’re able to drive 65 miles per hour through 13 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without even flinching.
7. You take your out-of-town guests to Casa Bonita even though you would never go there otherwise.
8. You think your major food groups are granola bars, tofu and Fat Tire Beer.
9. You design your kid’s Halloween costumes to fit over a snowsuit.
10. You think that sexy lingerie is wool socks and flannel PJs.
11. You know all 4 seasons: ‘almost winter,winter, still winter and spring blizzards.
12. You’ve been tear gassed in a riot to celebrate a CU/CSU victory.
13. You can never figure out why your out-of-town guests faint on a picnic to the mountains.
14. You can drive over a 12,000-foot pass in 4 feet of snow, but can’t get to work in 4 inches of snow.
15. You know the ‘correct’ pronunciation of Buena Vista.
16. When you visit friends at sea level, you can drink a case of beer and not get a buzz.
17. Your car insurance costs more than your car.
18. You have surge protectors on every outlet.
19. You think the lyric is: “April showers bring May blizzards”.
20. ‘Timberline’ is someplace you have actually been.
21. You know what a ‘Chinook’ is.
22. You know what a ‘Rocky Mountain Oyster’ is.
23. You know what a ‘fourteener’ is.
24. But you don’t know what a ‘turn signal’ is.
25. A bear on your front porch doesn’t bother you nearly as much as a Democrat in Congress does.
26. Your golf bag has a 9-iron, a 3-wood and a lightning rod.
27. People from out of state breathe 5 times as often as you do.
28. Having a Senator named Nighthorse doesn’t seem strange.
29. Having a Senator named “Changehorse” doesn’t seem strange.
30. Thunder has set off your car alarm.
31. You have an $800 stereo in your $300 truck.
32. You think a red light means 3 more cars can go.
33. Where we’re going, we don’t need roads!!
34. You know where the real ‘ South Park ‘ is.
35. You can recognize the license plates of all 50 states on sight.
36. Driving directions usually include ‘Go over_________ Pass.’
37. You’ve ‘checked for ticks.
38. You’ve dressed in shorts, sandals, and a parka with a hood.
39. You’ve gone snow skiing in July and………
40. You’ve played golf in January and…….
41. They were in the same year!
42. You’ve urinated on the Continental Divide just so it could run into both oceans.
43. And the most important: You get a certain feeling of satisfaction that California and Texas are both downstream.
44. You know what a down slope and an up slope weather pattern is.
45. You actually understand these jokes and send them to your Colorado friends.

Looks like talentless, super-rich Paris Hilton’s summer plans are spoiled.  The jail she was sentenced to serve her time is full!

It is the summer after all….peak season you know.  They’re fully-booked!

Heard about the woman in Oregan who was arrested for calling 911 to get a cute deputy’s name?

Okay women, listen up…if we believe that men could be interested in a ditzy, middle-aged woman whose brain usage is so limited that her solution to getting a guy’s name is to call 911…DUH…think again!

And I do mean THINK!

Please refer to my last entry here….

Dick Cheney was in Wyoming yesterday!!!!!!!  I had no clue he already accepted the invitation…..

Mark Morford, a www.sfgate.com columnist came out with his own version of the State of the Union and it’s so hilarious I just have to share it with you. 

Since we’re starting February, my birth month BTW, thought this little gem would make the transition a lot more fun.